MY LIFE WITH COUSIN CORA (Continued)

Several times during the night I woke up. I felt my nightie, my sheer bed sheets and the lace edging on my pillows. I seemed to be in a state of sort of a half way world. I mean by that, I was thrilled in a sub- conscious way at being Elsie but on the other hand I was ashamed and certain prospects brought a dread to my mind. Even after these years of reading and some study along with my wife on the subjedt of psychology I still find it difficult to explain these mixed feelings of ecstasy, dread, thrills, humiliation, bliss and shame. I know that some who read this will understand. I shivered there in my feminine bed as I thought of the washer-woman and her daughter and of facing them. You see I had taken the clothing with the full knowledge that they would be blamed and I had rationalized that Miss Cora would overlook it. (All those committing crimes "rationalize"). Many times I had been very rude

to our wash lady and rather lorded it over her and her daughter. I had treated them like they were "serfs" and I was young Lord Ellsworth At times (now to my regret) I had pinched the daughter and when she protested some of my activities I had told her in a most scornful way; "Oh what else are you good for but to have some fun with you are only a silly washerwoman's daughter, you'll never have education or anything else except a good build and a pretty face!" (I did not know that our wash- woman and her daughter had gone to Miss Cora and told her and I did not know that Miss Cora had told them to

wait a bit as there would be a big change soon) I did not know that soon I would learn a lesson in "True Democracy".

I also thought, as I lay there, of the Girl's Phys- ical Education Teacher, and my regular teacher in the small school. I could feel my face go crimson there in the dark as I thought of facing them and the girl's gym class. I thought of the several women and girls that I had been rude to in the village and my anticipation re- lative to all this was most disturbing. I did love to think of ladies' shops. I always liked to be near shops